Fun things to do at a goth club

My friend worked at a goth club and being the great friend I am, I went.
WOW-WOW-WOW
When I was in high school I was gothy. The reason I was gothy and not just simply goth was because I was Natasha. My high school boyfriend took me to a Peter Murphy concert and when I went I was told to stop smiling. Yeah, by him. That made me laugh harder…it was an awkward time. His loss.
Before we left to the club we had to figure out what I was supposed to wear. She was better at it than me. I ended up wearing diamond earrings and a pearl necklace. I ‘m like a Banana Republic goth. So we go and I’m immediately telling jokes and trying to blow out the dark goth candles. Then the game I started was trying to figure out what these people did as day jobs. As she is working, I am sitting in a corner of the club. Yes ma’am, this fun tidbit is coming directly from a goth club. I am writing in a corner and singing along. So they’re playing older stuff. I know my music. What can I say?
I told my friend I felt like Lydia from Beetlejuice (Betelgeuse) grew up and wanted to relieve her youth and has realized she's way better off now. Then I laughed too loud and got weird looks, at which I just proceeded to laugh louder.

Other fun things to do at a goth club:
While said friend is working, make silly dance moves. When she responds, gesture wildly. Mind you, this will take place across a large room and goth boys will run for cover when they can’t see who you’re playing around with and automatically assume you and said friend suffer from multiple personality disorder.

It feels like a Griffin and Sabine entry but in the best way possible.

Pretend you own the place and people will treat you as such.

There is nothing sadder than a fat goth girl.

Singing the White Stripes in your head and wanting nothing more than hearing any of their songs does not work in the least and you will feel like an idiot.

Ether moment: go to the bar adjacent to goth bar that shares a patio and they play the White Stripes. WTF. I am now in control of the universe! Let’s see what else I can conjure up.