My Jem Story

When I was little, I had an unhealthy obsession with Jem. She was the owner of an orphanage (her father died and she inherited it. What? It could happen!) Well, let me rephrase. Jerrica was the owner of the orphanage, but Jem was her hologram self as a rock singer. Jem and Jerrica were the same person. Jerrica had an orphanage filled with kids, and Jem was a fucking rock chick that had pink hair and was in a rock band and had star earring and was a hologram. Show time, Synergy!

One night, when I was about 6 or so, I had a kick ass dream that I had a Jem doll. In the dream, Jem and I went around town, sang in hardcore clubs with punks (I was a little too knowledgeable a child about the punk culture…) and got into fights with the Misfits. Not the Glen Danzig band, but the Jem and the Holograms rival band. Jem was so cool she had a rival band!

All was well and good until I woke up. It was time for school and I was so ready to bring Jem with me to show off to the bastard losers at school. The second I opened my eyes, and realized it was a dream and there was no doll, I had an overwhelming feeling of sadness. A profound loss even. It was as though someone had told me that everyone I knew had died, and before they died, they all said they thought I was ugly. There was nothing worse…ever! So I immediately start crying. The wail of a thousand banshee’s all coming out of my little mouth. My mom came running in thinking I was injured. When she asked what was wrong, I was already hyperventilating. I needed a paper bags to breath into. Finally, when I calmed down, and was able to speak, my mom asked me what was wrong. Telling her I had a dream about a doll and was devastated that I didn’t have the doll in waking life was sooo the wrong thing to say. She could not stop laughing. I never got that doll. And I never fully healed, either. Thanks mom, thanks a lot.